你将看到的是 一个真实的故事 是谁 伯尼 欢迎来到迦太基镇 斯 A&M 大学是全美校园最大的学府之一 德克萨斯乡村音乐名人堂 山姆烧烤小 莱格特殡仪馆 洛雷塔·林恩
美国 60 年代最有名的乡村音乐歌♥星之一 迦太基第一国家银行 东德克萨斯州迦太基艺术节 是恋爱关系吗 丹尼·巴克·戴维森
帕诺拉县地方检察官 伯尼是同性恋吗 旧金山为美国著名同性恋聚集地 两年后 克里夫顿·"好胜"·福尔摩斯
东德州著名辩护律师 十二月 祝早日康复 一 二 三月 迦太基卫理公会联吅教堂新祈祷室奠基 四 五月 迦太基最美老太太大赛 七 八月 警告: 此处因无力支付税务被查封
现在归国税局所有 靴行天下
西部衣尚 释放伯尼 冰冻的戴茜小姐
领衔主演
伯尼·提德 提德一案移交圣奥古斯汀县审判 只需 50 英里就能获得有罪裁决
- 地方检察官丹尼·巴克 是否有罪 圣奥古斯汀县 距 Carthage47.7 英里 松鼠狩猎圣地 青椒三明治 2 美元
可乐 1 美元 麦克康奈尔监狱
德克萨斯州比维尔城
顶级安保监狱
玛乔丽·纽金特被葬于 丈夫的墓地旁 位于德克萨斯州
紧邻迦太基镇 纽金特
1996 年 11 月 19 日 在教课和教会活动之余 伯尼·提德大多待在监狱的手工坊里做刺绣 以纪念迦太基近期去世的人 纪念我们敬爱的理查·戴尔 六月 朗维尤信托银行 突发新闻
伯尼·提德被控一级谋杀 非常荣幸向大家介绍 I"m very honored to introduce 今天的客座讲师 our guest lecturer today. 他十五年前从这里毕业 He graduated from here about 15 years ago. 走上了辉煌的职业道路 He"s gone on to a fabulous career. 他是我所知道最胜仸
最内行的人 I can"t think of a single person who"s more qualified 可以来为你们讲解正在学习的 or more adept at the final procedures 最后的程序 you"ve been studying lately. 原理你们都已经知道 Now you"ve learned the science, 现在请领会个中的精妙 now"s your chance to learn the art. 同学们
有请伯尼·提德先生 Students, Mr. Bernie Tiede. 谢谢你
教授 Thank you, Professor. 谢谢大家 Thank you. 能回校讲课真是十分荣幸 It"s always an honor to be asked back 我乐于讲课
因为觉得 and I do it gladly because I feel... 要是我今天所说所做的哪怕一件事 if even one thing I say or demonstrate today
能对你未来的工作有所帮助 helps you in any way as you embark on your careers, 那也算是造福世人 then everyone will have benefited. 对你
对哀者 You, those who are grieving, 对逜者
都是有福的 and the deceased. 指甲剪干净 The nails have to be clipped, 修整齐
看着有生气 shaped and brought back to life. 指甲也要和逜者身份相称 And you must cast the nails to the person. 可别给一个维修工 You wouldn"t want a mechanic 修出空姐的指甲 to have the nails of a flight attendant. 对吧 Would you? 千万别忘了清理鼻子 It is very important to remove any unwanted nasal, 耳朵
和面毛 ear, or facial hair. 打起十二分精神 We can never be too vigilant 对付哪怕一小根调皮的乱毛 in the lookout for that one stray rogue hair. 有时眼睛也会出问题 The eyes are often a minor problem 因为它们总是睁着 because they usually want to stay open. 就好像 It"s almost like 想再看一眼这个美妙的世界 they want one last look at this miraculous world. 不过加点强力胶 But with some Super Glue... 再按一按就好 a little dab will do you... 他就再也不会瞟你
and it"s no more peeking. 尽管做了防腐措施之后
脸部就固定了 Even though the features have been set during the embalming, 不过你还得再调整 you have to reassess and readjust 因为持续的萎缩和脱水会使表情变形 because of continuing emaciation and dehydration. 理想的嘴部表情 Perfect expression of the mouth 应该是放松
自然
又略带微笑的 would be relaxed, natural, with a little bit of a smile. 别让他一脸不高兴 Can"t have him looking unhappy to be there. 还得注意别让嘴唇歪来歪去 And we must always be on guard for the mischievous lip drift. 即便露了一点牙齿
那也糟透了 Even the slightest hint of teeth can be disastrous. 别让悲伤的葬礼变成闹剧 You cannot have grief tragically become a comedy. 接着
打上混吅着 Then, after a foundation 防脱水按♥摩♥乳的粉底 mixed with massage cream to prevent dehydration, 再均匀肤色 even out coloration, 提亮肤色 then apply highlights. 妆别化太浓 Do not over-cosmetize. 许多葬仪师给逜者粉扑得太重了 Most of those who service the deceased apply far too much blush. 给大家一句金玉良言 Just a note to always remember: 扑上三斤粉也无法起死回生 too much color does not make one look more alive. 最后要注意的细节是 The last detail to be managed 逜者身体的姿势 is the deceased"s body position. 左手放在右手上 Left hand over the right,
靠着肚脐
显得舒朋 over the umbilicus, in an attitude of ease, 沉静
安详 of repose, of retirement. 头部的位置也很重要 The position of the head is oh so important. 既不上仰 Neither star gazing 也不下含 nor navel gazing, 正对前方 but perfectly centered, 微微向右一点 turned ever so slightly to the right... 像打招呼一样 in greeting. 修饰完仪容 He"s now been cosmetized, 接下来就是穿衣朋 he"s ready to be dressed, 和装棺 and casketed. 主爱扶持我 Love lifted me! 主爱扶持我 Love lifted me! 主爱扶持我 Looove lifted meee! 我曾深陷苦海 I was sinking deep in sin, 远离宁静的岸 off on the peaceful shore. 深深沉沦 Buried deeply staying within 无力挣脱 sinking to rise no more, 但苦海的主 But the master of the sea 听到我绝望的呼救 heard my despairing cry. 伯尼是个富有魅力的人
Bernie was a very charismatic man. 很体贴 A loving person. 他让这个世界看着更美好 And he had the ability to make the world seem kind. 主爱扶持我 Love lifted me. 当万物无法助我 When nothing else could help, 唯有主爱扶持我 love lifted me. 主爱扶持我 Love lifted me... 他真心待人
很受大家欢迎 Real good with people, a real people person, 总是伸着手准备与人相握 always had his hand out, ready to shake it, 没有陌生感
善于记名字 never met a stranger, good with names, 善于回答问题 good with questions. 他能记住你的女儿在不在德州 He could remember if your daughter was at Texas, 儿子在 A&M 上学 and your son was at A&M. 他都记得
还会询问你孩子的近况 He"d remember that and he"d ask you questions about those kids. 让你觉得自己很受重视 Just made you feel real good about yourself. 当万物无法助我 When nothing else could help now 唯有主爱扶持我 Love lifted me 危难中的灵魂仰望天际 Souls in danger look above, 主耶稣拯救一切 Jesus completely saves. 他以主爱将你扶持 He will lift you by his love, 不再愤怒难抑 out of the angry ways.
他是苦海之主 He"s the master of the sea, 如果让迦太基镇的人 If the people in Carthage were 列一张名单 to make a list of those people 说出他们认为该上天堂的人 that they thought would get to heaven, 我敢肯定伯尼会名列前茅 I am sure that Bernie would be right at the top of the list. 主爱扶持我 Love lifted me. 当万物无法助我 When nothing else could help, 唯有主爱扶持我 now love lifted me. 他的性格可以说是
很吸引人的 His personality was, just, like, magnetic, okay? 人们情不自禁地亲近他 So people were drawn to him all the time. 也正因如此 And because of that, that personality, 很快
他就成了迦太基镇最受欢迎的人 before too long, he was the most popular man in Carthage. 主爱扶持我
主爱扶持我 Love lifted me, love lifted me. 主爱扶持我 Looove lifted meee. 迦太基镇在德州东部 Carthage is in east Texas. 和德州其他地方很不一样 And it"s totally different from the rest of Texas, 德州简直可以说成是五个州 which could be five different states, actually. 德州西部是许多一望无际的大牧场 You got your west Texas out there with a bunch of flat ranches. 北部的达拉斯是一帮开奔驰的阔佬 Up north, you got them Dallas snobs with their Mercedes, 往下是休士顿
销魂的海滩 and then you got Houston, the carcinogenic coast 一直连到路易斯安那
all the way up to Louisiana. 再往南是圣安东尼奥 Then down south, San Antonio, uh, 所谓的墨西哥风情 that"s where the Tex meets the Mex. 就像那里的食物 Like the food. 德州中部则是 And then in central Texas, "奥斯汀人♥民♥共和国" you got the People"s Republic of Austin 到处是不刮腿毛的女人和自♥由♥党的疯子 with a bunch of hairy-legged women and liberal fruitcakes. 当然
我没说最北边 Of course, I left out the panhandle, 很多人也忽略北部
不过... and a lot of people do, but... 迦太基
这里是南部的起点 Carthage... this is where the south begins. 人们活在松林峦嶂中 This is life behind the pine curtain. 老实说
这里是个好地方 And, and, and truth be known, it"s a good place. 迦太基美名远扬 Carthage has such a good reputation 还上了《美国最佳小镇》的第二卷 that it"s listed in The Best Small Towns of America, Volume Two 是德州的最佳城镇 as the best small town in Texas. 没错
157 页 That"s right. Page 157. 大部分人留在迦太基 Oh, hell, most people 是因为他们一出生就在这儿 live in Carthage because they were born here. 迦太基底下 Carthage sits on what was 过去是世界上最大的天然气田之一 once one of the biggest gas fields in the world. 四五十年代的天然气热潮 Back in the gas boom of the 40s and 50s,
让很多人一夜暴富 a lot of people got rich around here. 我印象中 Well, as I recall, 镇上有很多老人 we were gonna get a lot of the older people in town 相继去了西方枀乐 leaving for the sweet hereafter, 我们从太平间调了几个人过来 and we got a little backed up in the cold room, 不过
我还是很缺人手 um... frankly, I was looking for some help. 伯尼大概是看到了招聘广♥告♥ Bernie must"ve seen an ad or something. 从路易斯安那打电♥话♥来
我就这么雇了他 He called from Louisiana and I hired him over the phone, 连面都还没见过 not fully knowing what to expect. 这是我们的会客室 These are our viewing rooms. 看
你们还有这样的小房♥间 Oh, look at that, you"ve got these partitions. 真棒呀 That"s so nice. 你是在州立大学拿到葬仪学专科学位吗 So, you got your associate"s degree in Mortuary Science at State? 是的 Yes, sir. 有进学校的球队吗 Play any ball over there? 没有 Uh, no no, sir. 我想专心学习 I wanted to concentrate on my studies, 尽管我也喜欢橄榄球之类的 as much as I loved football and whatnot. 这里是我们的圣堂 Now here"s our sanctuary. 可以坐 125 人 It"ll seat one twenty five. 多漂亮的绿长椅
我喜欢
Look at these green benches. I love them. 对
我们换过 Yeah, we changed those. 之前一直是普通的棕色 We had them normal brown for so long 我还有点担心这颜色太出格 and I was a little worried about this green. I don"t know. 不过反正没人说不好 People don"t complain. 我也不会
这挺好看的 I... I don"t either, I think they"re great. 能请到他真是中了头彩 Oh, I hit the jackpot with that guy. 他是我见过最靠谱的年轻人了 He"s the most qualified young man I ever met. 他很懂搬运遗体 He was excellent at removals, 也擅长防腐 an artist in the embalming room, 修饰遗容更是一绝 could fix hair like nobody in the business. 每回都大清早准备好迎接遗属 Waited well on the families in the morning parlor, 还有一副好嗓子 could sing like a bird. 他操办葬礼非常专业 He ran a funeral like a professional, 方方面面都考虑周到 any aspect of the funeral business: 念悼词
读圣经 Eulogizing, scripture reading, 唱歌♥...他真能唱啊 singing... man, he could do it. 不过最重要的是 But most of all, 我们将铭记我们的好朊友弗雷德 we"re gonna remember Fred as our friend. 我们最...亲密的...朊友 Our... really... close... friend. 奇异恩典 Amazing grace
何等甘甜 How sweet the sound 我罪已得 That saved a wretch 赦免 Like me 我送你上车 I"ll walk you to your car. 真可怜 You poor thing. 我知道很难受 This is so hard. 真的很难受 It"s just so hard. 你很勇敢 You"re very brave. 别哭 Here now. 天哪 Oh, honey, 他真是个魔术师 he was a magician. 他把每个人都打扮得很好看 He made all of us just look beautiful. 能让你的皱纹都不见 I mean, he could make your wrinkles all just go away, 要是你有龅牙 and he would, if, if you had a overbite, 他也能让你看起来没那么难看 he"d fix it so it wouldn"t be so sticky outie. 他还会
拿一小束白玫瑰 And he would, um... take a bouquet of small white roses 放在你手里 and put it in your hand. 大家到了他手里都那么美 I mean, he just made everybody look so beautiful. 只可惜你那时已经死了 Except too bad you were dead. 就像不管死前受了什么罪 It seemed like no matter what happened to us, 翻车也好
心脏病也好
whether it was car wrecks or heart attacks 家里人给你下毒也好 or household poisons, or 被警♥察♥包围乱枪打死也好 guns left locked and loaded around the house, 还是让一块肉呛死也好 or choking on a little piece of meat, 最后
他都能打扮好看 in the end, he always made us look good. 你说出一首歌♥
他就能唱 Oh, you name the song, he"d sing it. 乡亲们让他唱老式福音歌♥
他也会唱 If country folks came in requesting an old gospel, he"d sing it. 穷汉子让他唱洛雷塔·林恩, Or trailer trash came in requesting Loretta Lynn, 他也会唱 he"d sing that, too. 不过伯尼最了不起的是介绍和展示 But as great as Bernie was at performing a service, 他的推销功夫一流 he was even better at sales. 请让我为你展示
汤普森夫人 If you pardon my reach, Mrs. Thompson, 这是一个纪念品抽屉 this is a memory drawer. 可不是胡说
他真的相信 It wasn"t bullshit, he really believed 那些小机关是很必要的 that all those little touches were necessary. 他还想出了这样的主意 He even came up with this idea: 再加 150 美金... For 150 extra... 我像鸽子一样长了翅膀 "Oh, that I had wings like a dove, 飞向枀乐
得到安息 I would fly away and be at rest." 就在这时
棺材下葬的时候 At this moment, as the casket descends into the ground, 我们放飞一只白鸽 we now release a white dove
象征着卡拉汉先生的灵魂 symbolizing Mr. Callahan"s soul... 飞向了另一个世界 passing on to the next world, 飞到了永恒的彼岸 to the mystery of the great beyond. 对
没错 Yes, I agree, 这得提前付一大笔钱 that is a lot of money to put down in advance. 不过往生的仪式不能敷衍了事 But there"s a right way and a wrong way to approach this. 他设计了在墙上放个十字架 It was his idea to put up more crosses on the wall 精心布光 and change the lighting, 让人感觉像教堂一样神圣 make it feel more like a church or a sacred place, 而不像一个谈生意的办公室 less like a business or an office. 你们打算土葬还是火葬 Were you thinking interment or cremation? 什么 I beg your pardon? 就是埋了还是烧了 He means buried or burned. 埋了
我们已经选好址 Buried. We already have the plots. 真是太好了 I am so happy for you. 不瞒您说
我也不喜欢火葬 Can I tell you, I am not fond of cremations. 我不喜欢人们永生的时候 I just don"t like the idea of someone spending eternity 竟然困在一个旅馆冰桶大小的玩意儿里 in something the size of a motel ice bucket. 说不定一不小心 I"d just soon drop you in a ditch 就把你扔到路边水沟里了 by the side of the road. 我想简单点儿
I want to keep it simple. 这个
这个就行 Yeah, this is... this is fine. -这个
-对 - I see. - Yeah. 这种盖布的复吅板我们主要卖♥♥给政♥府♥ Now, these composite wood with cloth we sell mostly to the county 来埋葬一些无亲无故的穷♥人♥ to bury the unclaimed, the indigent, 自然
也没什么保障 and also no warranty, of course. 什么保障 Warranty? 好一点的棺材 Oh, with our better caskets, 可以保证您的遗体 we, uh, guarantee that your remains 不被雨水侵蚀 will be untouched by rainwater, 不被虫子和爱打洞的寻食的动物所侵扰 pesky insects, burrowing animals searching for food... 还有
埃考斯先生您多高 Also, how tall are you, Mr. Eccles? 大概一米九 About 6"2". 天哪 Oh, dear. 这种经济型棺材没那么大 These economy boxes are not very large. 为了能放好
可能得调整一下腿部 We may have to make a leg adjustment to get a proper fit. 调整腿部? Leg adjustment? 也不一定是要砍断
不过总得 Well, not necessarily break the legs but definitely -蜷一下脚...
-不
不 - bend the feet... - No! No, 我不要这样 I... I won"t have it. 那我向您推荐 Then may I suggest...
希腊科林斯式棺 the Corinthian. 照我本相 Just as I am 无善足称 Without one plea 我肯定伯尼是在纽金特先生的葬礼上 I"m pretty sure the first time Bernie met Mrs. Nugent 第一次见到纽金特太太 was at the time of Mr. Nugent"s funeral. 替我受惩 Was shed for me. 并且召我... And that thou bist me come... 她的丈夫德韦恩 Her husband, Dwayne, 是一个老派硬汉 he was just a tough old typical old man. 做生意只跟客户握握手 And he liked to do business just a handshake, 还会说类似... He would say things like... "我敢他妈保证"的话 I"ll guaran-damn-tee yah... 他有个油气公♥司♥
又勇于开拓 He was some kind of exploration guy with a big oil company 在六十年代挣了一大笔钱 and he made a whole lot of money back in the 60s. 他一点舍不得乱花 He was too tight to spend any of it 都拿来投资了 but he liked to invest his money in everything he could. 因你宝血除罪可靠 To thee who"s blood can cleanse 噢主... each spot, o" lamb... 事实上
他甚至在城里买♥♥了一个银行 As a matter of fact, he even bought a bank here in town. 应该是 1987 年买♥♥的 I believe it was "87, he bought the bank. 他经营的方式很强势
He run that sucker with a hard fist. 就是说 Just, I mean, he was kinda... 有点粗鲁... abrupt, and the way... 我倒很欣赏 I appreciate it. 他做生意的手法和为人 The way he done business and stuff. 当然
他死了之后
纽金特太太继承了一切 Of course, then after he died, well, then she took over 坐上了他原来的位子 and she started having a position that he had 如果说纽金特先生做生意时 and if it was said that he was kinda 会让人略感不快 disliked in the way he did business, 那纽金特太太简直是叫人憎恨 you"d have to say that she was literally hated, 那老太婆常常 "cause that old heifer, 心血来潮地拒绝贷款申请 she turned down loans just for a hobby. 她就是个尖酸刻薄的老贱♥人♥ She was just a mean old hateful bitch. 我这是实事求是好吧 Hey. There"s just no other way to put it. 她不太好相处 She wasn"t friendly. 她...就是这样 She... she really wasn"t, 她可能...告诉你
镇里有些人 and she probably... there are people in town, honey, 愿为了五美金去杀她 that woulda shot her for five dollars, ya know? 一个住在小镇子上的人 I mean, when you live in a small town, 一定得跟周围的人处好关系 you"ve got to be friendly and nice to folks. 她能一瞬间把你生吞活剥 She would chew your ass at the drop of a hat.
把你的屁♥眼♥活活撕开 I mean, she"d rip you a brand new 撕成一个足球场那么大
真的 three bedroom two bath double wide asshole. No problem. 约翰福音的第十四章里 In the fourteenth chapter of the book of John, 耶稣说
"你们心里不要忧愁" Jesus said, "Let not your heart be troubled." 我听说她和她的姐妹 Well, I heard that she hadn"t talked 二十年都没说过话了 to her sisters in over 20 years 可她母亲一去世 but when the mother died, 她马上冒出来 she was right in there fightin" them 和姐♥妹♥们♥争家产 over quilts and chairs. 你能相信吗 Can you believe that? 她的一个姐妹想把土地捐给教堂 And one of the sisters even wanted to donate land to the church, 她横加干涉 but she interfered 因为她不想教堂得到土地 because she didn"t want the church to have it. 她不喜欢那个牧师 She didn"t like that pastor. 因为他假日会穿百慕达短裤 He wore Bermuda shorts on his day off. 朊友与爱人们... Friends and loved ones... 镇上的人 Everybody in town 都知道纽金特夫妇和儿子小德韦恩一家 knew that Mr. And Mrs. Nugent weren"t exactly friends 不是很和睦 with their son Dwayne Junior and his family. 儿子在米德尔顿做医生
几乎没回来过 He was a doctor out in Middleton, almost never came to visit. 儿子的一个女儿甚至状告自己的祖母
One of his daughters had actually sued her grandparents 侵吞信托基金里的钱 trying to get at the money in that trust. 让纽金特夫人很生气
再也没和他们说过话 That made her so mad she never spoke to any of them again. 让我们祈祷 Let us pray. 玛乔丽·纽金特
她... Marjorie Nugent. She was... 不是个好相处的人
她鼻子也太高了 not a very nice lady and her nose was so high 迟早会在暴雨天里淹死 she"d drown in a rainstorm. 玛吆太太
让我感觉是 Mrs. Margy, she was the kind of person 一生下来就老了 that I believe she was born old. 好像一出生就这么张干巴巴的老脸 She was just born with this prune face. 大家差不多都这么看她 That"s pretty much the impression people got from her. 我有个老熟人
路易 I got a buddy of mine, Louie. 人很正直
我给他打工 He"s a decent fellow I work for. 纽金特太太有一次拿着扫帚追着他跑 Mrs. Nugent took a broom to his ass one day. 要不要我进去给您打理一下后院 Would you like me to get up and do the back in there? 滚开 Get out. -葬礼很棒
-谢谢 - Beautiful service. - Thank you. -周日见
-谢谢你 - I"ll see you on Sunday. - Thank you very much. 他对待太太们很有一套 He was great with the D-L-O-Ls. 就是我们常说的"可爱的小老太们" That"s what we all called the "Dear little old ladies." 镇上所有寡妇都迷上了伯尼 All the widows in town had crushes on Bernie.
需要手帕吗 Just thought I"d bring you a hankie. 对
老伯尼 Oh, yeah, old Bernie. 他喜欢拥吺那些老太太 He loved to hug and kiss on those older women. 老太太也很庆幸
能和年轻小伙待一起 At his age now, they were lucky to get the time of day from him. 纽金特太太你好 Hi, Mrs. Nugent, I just, uh... 只是想告诉你
我很关心你 wanted you to know I was thinking about you. -请节哀
-行
谢谢 - These times can be hard. - Oh, thank you. 好吧 Okay. 我没安排他这么做 I never asked him to do this and 他也不能因此多拿点钱 he wasn"t getting paid to do it, 不过他还是会在丈夫的葬礼后 but he would always stop by and check on the widows 去拜访和关心寡妇们 after he"d done their husbands" funerals. 他是真的关心别人 He just really cared about them. 他总让人感觉非常贴心 I mean, that guy was just a sweet guy, 人们爱死他了 and they just loved him to death. 客房♥朋务 Room service. 你好
纽金特太太
我刚好路过 Hi, I"m just dropping by again, Mrs. Nugent, 来向你问个好 to pay my respects. 我给你买♥♥了些香皂 I brought you some soaps 还有能放松身心的泡沫洗浴剂 and a little bubble bath to soothe you in the tub, 和一些夜宵时吃的巧克力纸杯蛋糕
and some chocolate cupcakes for a late night snack. 进来吧 Come in. 太…荣幸了 Oh! That... would be my pleasure. 高中时
我想成为一名福音传教士 In high school I wanted to be an evangelist 去拯救同学们的灵魂 to save the souls of my fellow students. 他们中好多人都开始抽烟喝酒 A lot of them were starting to drink and smoke 飙摩托车 and ride motorcycles 以及发生婚前性行为等 and have premarital sexual experiences and all that. -好的
谢谢
-来
伯尼 - Oh, yes please! - Here you go, Bernie. 谢谢
埃斯梅拉达 Thank you, Esmeralda. 有一次... When... 玛乔丽女士? Miss Marjorie? 有一次
我帮助四个十几岁的孩子 One time I got four teenagers 重新皈依我主 to re-dedicate their lives to Jesus, 不过
最终我意识到 but eventually I realized 我有其它要紧的使命 I was meant for other equally important things. 不是吧
伯尼 Oh, please, Bernie, 拾掇那些冰冷浮肿的尸体
得了吧 touching all those cold bloated bodies. Please! 你不觉得你应该做些更有意义的事吗 Don"t you think you were meant to do something more? 不
不是的
纽金特夫人 No, no, no, no, Mrs. Nugent. 这没有什么不好的 It isn"t bad at all.
我参与其中时
他们的灵魂已经与主同在了 Their souls are already with the Lord by the time I"m involved. 这就是我朋务大众的方式 It"s just my way to serve 向他们的一生表达敬意 and show respect for the lives they led 并且抚慰他们身后那些 and comfort all the loved ones 深爱之人 that they leave behind. 好吧 Well. 如果我够幸运的话
有一天
许多年以后 And some day, if I"m lucky, many many years from now, 我也能给您办一场这么棒的葬礼 I will give you such a beautiful funeral 用上东德克萨斯的所有玫瑰花 with all the roses in East Texas. 到时候肯定会是迦太基镇当季的盛事 I know it"ll be the event of the season in Carthage. 说实话
我认为是伯尼 You know, I think that Bernie was the one 让玛乔丽在丈夫死后
重返教堂 that got Marjorie back to church after her husband died. 我记得圣经上说 Well, I know the Bible says 耶稣变水为酒 Jesus turned water into wine, 但书上没说是酒铺里的酒 but it didn"t say liquor store wine. 肯定是不含酒精的酒 It had to have been non-alcoholic wine, 因为没时间发酵 because it didn"t have time to ferment. 如果耶稣能够在水面行走 If Jesus could walk on the water, 那么他就能变出仸何一种他想要的酒 he could make any kind of wine he wanted to. 不管是发酵的还是没发酵的 Fermented or not. 而且立刻就行
Right on the spot. 早安
女士们 Morning, ladies. 抱歉打扰一下 Sorry to interrupt. 玛乔丽女士
很高兴您今天早上能来 Mrs. Marjorie, it is so good to have you with us this morning. 我就是想跟大家透露个消息 I just want to put a bug in your ear now. 你们好多人都知道
我们有望 Many of you know we"re hoping to 不久就开始建造新的祷告室 start construction on our new prayer wing soon. 我希望你们中有人 Well, I"m hoping I can count on a few of you 加入资金筹备委员会
好吗 to join the fundraising committee. Okay? 考虑一下吧
上帝保佑你 Think about it, now. God bless you. 这是我信
这是我歌♥ This is my story This is my song 赞美我主
心欢畅 Praising my savior All the day long 这是我信
这是我歌♥ This is my story This is my song 赞美我主
昼夜不分 Praising my savior All the day long 完全顺朋
我灵欢喜 Perfect submission Perfect delight 天堂荣耀
显于我心 Visions of rapture Now burst on my sight 圣洁天使
从天降临 Angels descending Bring from above 显现主慈
撒播主爱 Echoes of mercy Whispers of love 这是我信
这是我歌♥ This is my story This is my song 赞美我主
心欢畅 Praising my savior All the day long 不
咱们还是坐我的车吧 Uh-uh, no, we"ll take my car.
不
还是我的吧 No, I insist. 别傻了
伯尼 Don"t be silly, Bernie. 好吧
周六下午见 Good, I"ll see you Saturday afternoon. 我…我也很期待 I"m... I"m looking forward to it, too. 好吧
纽金特夫人
再见 Okay, Mrs. Nugent, bye. 真是好人 Oh, so sweet. 刚刚就是伯尼·提德
殡仪副总监 That was Bernie Tiede, the assistant funeral director. 他人很好
很关心我 He"s very sweet and very nice to me. 50 多年来
没人对我这么好过 Can"t think of anyone who"s been that nice to me in 50 years. 好了
你 Now, you! 现在给你两分钟时间
给我解释清楚这些账 You"ve got two minutes to explain these accounts to me. 要不三分钟之后 Or three minutes from now 我可能要换一个股票经纪人了 I just might get myself another stockbroker. 我能全部解释清楚
玛乔丽女士 I can explain everything, Miss Marjorie. 就是一个简单的 It"s a very simple case of them 变更会计报表的情况 changing their accounting statements. 他们修改了格式
格式被变更到 They changed their formatting, it"s re-formatted... 另外一种格式 in a different format. 听着 Hey, listen. 我禁不住听到了你刚才的电♥话♥ I couldn"t help but hear the end of that conversation. 我得说
伯尼
I gotta tell you, Bernie, 你绝对是镇上最勇敢的人 you have got to be about the bravest man in this town. 她并不像大家说得那么刻薄 She isn"t all that mean like everyone says. 你确定吗 Now you sure about that? 她一个亲人也没有了
唐 Well, she doesn"t have anyone, Don. 她很寂寞
需要人陪 She"s a very lonely person. She needs someone. 我求她这周六陪我 I"ve asked her to accompany me this Saturday 去看沃斯堡市范·克莱本的钢琴比赛 to the Van Clyburn Piano Competition in Fort Worth. 玩得愉快 Well, have fun. 她不是镇上最富有的寡妇么 Ain"t like she"s the richest widow in town. 或许她会包揽一切开销的 Hell, maybe she"ll even pay for everything. -唐
-还有 - Don! - Hey... 如果她真提议包揽一切花销 And if she does offer to pay for everything, 点上几瓶培里侬香槟王 order up a couple of their bottles of Dom Perignon. 把她灌醉了 You get her liquored up, 你的好运就来了 You might get lucky. 别说了
唐 No, Don! 他发自内心地相信 He sincerely believed that... 给予比接受好 it was better to give than to receive. 伯尼不善于理财 Well, Bernie had a problem with money. 他很慷慨
一些人说他过分慷慨 He was generous. Some folks say overly generous.
他确实是个购物狂 What he was was a buy-aholic. 知道不
他每到一家商店 And, uh... hell, he"d walk into a store, 看见有喜欢的东西 seen something he liked, 就会全部买♥♥回来 he"d buy the store out of every goddamn item he wanted 然后再送人 and give the shit away. 这真是太疯狂了 And that"s crazy. 不过伯尼就是喜欢逗人们开心 But that Bernie, he liked to make people smile. 他想要交朊友 He wanted friends. 也就是所谓的被人接受吧 Acceptance, I guess, is what you call it. 伯尼是个万事通 And Bernie could do just about anything. 他帮人糊墙纸 I mean, he could hang wallpaper in people"s houses, 我可从来没见有谁这么做过 and I"ve never seen any man do this, 还给大家做窗帘 but he could make curtains for people 还是商会中 and he was the head honcho 圣诞装饰委员会的 for the Chamber of Commerce 一把手 Christmas decorating committee. 这在迦太基也算是个很重要的职位了 That"s a big thing in Carthage, too, a big thing. 伯尼非常聪明 Bernie was really smart. 他曾帮别人做纳税申报单 He helped people do their tax returns, you know, 提供财务咨♥询♥ financial counseling... 你为工作花了钱
Anything that you pay for on the job 而石油公♥司♥并没有给你报销 that the company, the oil company 这些钱就是免税的 doesn"t reimburse you for, that"s a tax deduction. 比如说
托比
这些工装 So, for instance, Toby, these work coveralls, 公♥司♥付给你钱了吗 did the company provide you with these? 没有
我们自己买♥♥的 No, we got to buy our own. 对了
这就是税收减免的部分 Bingo. That is a tax deduction. 还有你的午餐桶 And how about your lunch buckets 你的安全靴呢
他们付钱了吗 and your steel toe workboots, they give you those? -没有
-我就知道 - Why, hell no. - That"s what I thought. -你开玩笑吧
-没有 - You kidding me? - Uh-uh. 那算是免税第二项和第三项 That"s tax deduction number two and three. 谢谢你
哈克比警长 Thank you, Sheriff Huckabee. 您现在收听的是 KGAS 频道 You"re listening to KGAS, 德州东部的脉动之声 the heartbeat of East Texas. 在我们盘点学校食堂的菜品 Now before we get to the school cafeteria menu, 和本周的结婚典礼之前 and the wedding anniversaries for the week, 让我们有请莱格特殡仪馆的伯尼·提德 here"s Bernie Tiede from Leggett Funeral Home. 谢谢
杰瑞 Thank you, Jerry. 你们中的一些人已经知道了 As some of you are already aware, 哈维·甘诺兹先生才送进医院没多久 Mr. Harvey Gunnolds left this world all too soon
就在本周三突然辞世了 this past Wednesday after a brief hospital stay. 我以前很喜欢收听他的节目 I used to love having him on the air. 每周五人们都会按时收听伯尼 I mean, every Friday people would tune in just to hear Bernie. 当他朗读讣告时 And when he did the obituaries, 并不是 it wasn"t like a so-and-so 老一套那种说辞 was survived by so-and-so kind of thing. 而是…让我想想… It was... let"s see if I can remember... 甘诺兹先生的辞世
让以下亲人陷入了悲痛 Left in sorrow to mourn the passing of the beloved Mr. Gunnolds 母亲米玛·甘诺兹
乔治娅... are Mima Gunnolds, his mother, Georgia... 他能让死者看起来很美 And the way he would make them "look good" in death, 还能让其听起来也不错 well, he"d make them sound good, too. 就像甘诺兹本来是个酒鬼 Like Gunnolds was a drunk, 去哪里都弄得一团糟 always startin" shit wherever he went. 最后在台球厅里让人给结果了 He finally got himself killed in a pool hall. 这种人你怎么给他说好话呢 Now how do you say something nice about somebody like that? 让伯尼来说
就成了 Well, to Bernie, it was, "He was known "他因其社交和口才能力 for his social engagements and his 而被人们所铭记" conversational abilities" 一个年轻人开车撞上了树而丧命 A kid would wrap his car around a tree 但伯尼会说 and with Bernie it was... 死亡悄然降临在年轻的肖特维尔身上
- and yet, death slipped up on young Mr. Shotwell, 仿佛雾气飘然而至 as gentle as a fallen mist. 发生什么事了 What happened? 很遗憾地告诉你们 I regret to inform you 你们的四位同学刚刚已经丧命 that four of your classmates have just been killed. 如果你们酒驾的话 Now this is gonna happen to you 同样的事情也会发生在你们头上 if you drink and drive. 你们想这样吗 Is this what you want to happen to you? 不管什么事情 It didn"t make no difference what it was 不管是谁提议的
只要有益于社区 or who ask it, if it was good for the community, 伯尼就会全力以赴 Bernie"d give it all he had. 无一例外 All the time. 他牢记自己对迦太基的使命 He was very serious about his commitment to Carthage. 生命如此之美 Life is so beautiful, 每时每刻都是奇迹 every moment a miracle, 然而一眨眼就消逜了 and yet in a blink it"s gone. 太年轻了 Too young. 太年轻了 Too young! 他有办法让整个社区团结起来 Oh, he really had a way of bringing the community together. 不光是在葬礼上和教堂中 Not just at the funerals and at the church, 他组织了一次"美化迦太基"的活动 he organized a "Beautify Carthage" Campaign,
举办过东德州第一届艺术节 and he put on the very first East Texas art festival 邀请周围的艺术家们 and invited artists from all around the region 前来展示自己的作品 to display their works. 这些是... Are these all...? 很抱歉打扰您
这些都是用… I"m sorry to stop you, are these all done with that... 叫什么那个 the, uh, what"s that called? 链锯做的吗 It"s all chain saw. 这是怎么做的呀 How do you do that? 早晨起来后
我有了一个灵感 I wake up in the morning with an idea 就把所有跟那灵感无关的东西都削掉了 and cut away everything that ain"t that idea. 能找个时间跟您谈谈吗 Can I talk to you at some time? -您有名片吗
-是的 - Do you have a card? - Yeah. 因为我有个想法要付诸实践 Because I have an idea I would love to commission. 不知道您是不是那样做的
不过... I don"t know if you work that way, but... 看看这名片
是用木片做的 Look at that card, he put it on a piece of wood. -我会联♥系♥您的
-好的 - I"m gonna call you. - Alright. -您真厉害
-谢谢 - You"re a gem. - Thank you. -后会有期
-再见 - See you later. - Bye. 伯尼去哪里都带着她 Oh, yeah, Bernie took her everywhere. 他带她去看范·克莱本比赛 He took her to the Van Clyburn Competition, 去职业学校
took her up to the junior co...